Does anyone know what Stevie Shears is up to these days? Last I heard of him, he was in some band called Faith Global - but how long ago was that??? Stevie seems to get pretty much overlooked in the whole Ultravox scheme of things, which seems a little unfair to me given that he did play (rather excellent) guitar on two out of the band's seven 'proper' albums - and that his contribution to the sound of the John Foxx-fronted band was a huge one. It's almost as if there's a certain amount of embarrassment about the fact that Stevie was escorted out of the band, as opposed to having left of his own accord, as Robin Simon did. Shears' departure was, as I understand it, more a matter of a clash between the sound Stevie liked to make on a guitar and the suitability of that for placement within the overall sound that the rest of the band wanted to hear on their next record. In other words, it was about a conflict of styles rather than any lack of ability on Stevie's part.

Anyway, if anyone knows anything about the whereabouts and/or doings of the said Mr Shears, please let me know.

I'm away to listen to Young Savage...

Wide Boy

Ey-up Wide Boy.

I heard a vicious rumour that Stevie woz plying his new trade in The Little Chef on the A69 near Carlisle. On a recent jaunt to Caerlaverock Castle near Dumfries I decided to give the gaff a once-over in the hope of meeting Stevie.

However, upon ordering my 'Early Starter' brekky with a side portion of baked beans, I learned from the young waitress with the pert little derriere that there was no-one employed there called Stevie Shears. A fruitless visit I then thought.

That was, until a beautiful young chef personally delivered my brekky [with a side portion of baked beans] to my table. I visit that very same forum myself. Jeez !
PIGGY ; Haway man lass, yer pullin' me p*sser aren't ya ?
CHEF ; No, honestly
PIGGY ; Strite up ? What's ya log-in name then ?
CHEF ; It's Volglory
PIGGY ; [SURPRISED] Ya jestin' aren't ya pet ?
CHEF ; No, gospel !
PIGGY ; Wel, well, blow my trumpet !!
CHEF ; But you can call me George, it's short for Georgina.
PIGGY ; George eh ! So that Flip Martian gadgey was right after all Volglory...you really are called George !! You're a gorgeous petite young miss if I may be so bold. And there was owld Flip thinkin' ya were a six-foot nowt warehouseman anarl. Eee, it's a small world pet. Is there any chance o' some extra BACON RASHERS while the gaffer's not lookin !!!!

And the moral of the story is.......

Owld Philip aint as daft as he looks

No, the real moral to this story is:

Giving CP extra bacon rashers will get you a very nice tip.

- Your friendly "Little Chef" Georgina
(Our motto is "We aim to please.")

Oh but you do [did] Georgina !

That was as funny as see'in Hibs gettin' it up them fae Livvy in the CIS cup final!

But norraz funny as shiftin' ti Murrayfield eh Sleepy

Nah....Not nearly as much as you not playin' in da premiership...
The words 'RAM IT PORKY' come to mind

LOL

There's only one Terry Butcher !!

Aye, a knar he's motherwell but so wot eh...

And it's not often ya hear owld Porky supportin BUTCHERS !!!!

Geez a call when ye get a mo matey ok.
We need to meet up fir a few o' the finest!!!

This forum gets more like some weird psychedelic dream every day...

AYE.....yer no wrang there son

You up for a Shandy or four then Philip ?

A good idea mate. How about a mini voxgate for anyone interested.
Piggy, since the Monument gig has been set back a bit then why divvent we get our arses up to Edinburgh and have a bit crack with Sleepy et al.
This may also involve downing a few gallons o'beer and scoffin' the finest Injunz scran the city has tae offer. Whaddya think mate??

SHANDY???? Urrrghhh.... Travel all that way for shandy? I think not... :p

Edinburgh is a great city though - if I had the dosh I'd come up for a weekend like a shot.

Very delicate constitution I have these days, so the only booze I can drink to anywhere near excess is white wine. Leave the beer bellies to others...

Vintage Wine eh Flip ! I bet you are to Wine...what I am to Curries.

And, speaking of your recent visit north of the border, why don't you share with us 'Your' curry tale. Yes, I remember you mentioning a visit to the Injunz whilst up there. Did your Shantalle hev ti put ya boxers inta quarantine then squire And did Rose from the B&B hoy ya a cleaning bill thru the post for poopin' in ya sleep on her new bed linen

Dinnat worry kiddo, that curry works in mysterious ways. Yer norra proper man until ya 'Cack The Sack' so ti speak

I'm sorry...are you speaking English? Are you sure you didn't escape from the pages of Viz?

There's a luvverly Indian place on the Royal Mile...can't remember what it was called though...

BOING (time for bed)

Poor effort that mind <img border="0" alt="[Shake head]" title="" src="graemlins/shakehead.gif" />

Time for bed indeedy.
Watch ya don't hev an accident during tha neet,
Your Cherelle'll hefta rake that gas mask out again.....

Very clever, what you're doing with me girlie's name...I reckon you'll run out of alternative spelling by Christmas though...

Flip.. that Indian.. it's either Khushi's or Suruchi? Can't beat the Mussel Inn on Rose Street...

Eh ? Didn't realise I had sbelt it wrang. But ya knar wot my sbelligns like <img border="0" alt="[Shake head]" title="" src="graemlins/shakehead.gif" />

Not sure I've been there...I have a really bad memory for names... <img border="0" alt="[Shake head]" title="" src="graemlins/shakehead.gif" />

So have I...Now, was it Chantelle, Shantall, Cherelle or Chantal